10 Flirting Tips For Guys - Keep Your Goal In Mind!
So you want to learn the best ways to flirt? Before we get into the top 10 flirting tips for guys, let's first take a look at how you should approach a communication and interaction with a woman if you want to be successful.
Flirting isn't about impressing women. It's about expressing your interest in a woman and doing it in a playful, subtle way. When it's done properly, flirting is a way for a guy and a girl to discover whether they're attracted to each other.
Flirting is not about impressing her !
First of all, you're not there to impress her or to show off. This is the part about flirting that guys screw up the most. Flirting is not about showing off! If you hear a guy talking to a girl about his luxury car, his high paying job, or his massive savings account, he may think he's flirting but he's in fact trying to impress her, and probably failing at that.
In reality, flirting isn't about impressing women. It's about expressing your interest in a woman and doing it in a playful, subtle way.
What is flirting then?
When it's done right, flirting is a way for a guy and a girl to figure out whether they're attracted to each other.
Here's the thing. If you walk up to a girl and say, "Hey, you're cute, wanna come home with me?" - that isn't flirting. It's being extremely direct and forward. It bypasses all the build up of a mating ritual and will usually turn a girl off.
However, if you walk up to a woman, smile at her, get her to laugh, make good eye contact, and maybe wink ... all this stuff transmits interest to her.
While communicating interest is excellent, you don't want to stop there. You want your flirting to not just let her know that you're interested, but you also want to learn whether or not she's going to return your interest.
If she does return it, that's an excellent indicator, keep going! If not, you need to decide right quickly whether you should change tactics or walk away.
Always remember what your goal is.
Generally, as a man your goal is to communicate two things in your flirting:
1) Your male sexuality
2) Your confidence
Women find both of these qualities incredibly attractive. Communicate them indirectly and non-verbally, and you'll have women feeling warm and tingly when they fantasize about you. Women are emotional and empathetic creatures - they respond to feelings and strong emotions. So if you transmit your confidence and your male sexuality when you flirt, women WILL respond!
Okay ... now with that out of the way, let's dig into the:
TOP 10 FLIRTING TIPS FOR GUYS
1) Open your interaction with energy!
Greet people in a happy, spirited, but above all, energetic way. The first impression is key, and it's a lot harder to kick off your interaction in a low-energy way and build up than it is to start full of energy and let things settle down.
The more energy you have at the beginning, the more willing she'll be to let herself to be swept away by your energy.
Yes, you can have too much energy, and come across like a maniac. Don't do that. Calibrate your energy level appropriate to the situation. You want to be just a little bit more energetic than she is, but not too much more. Coming into a relaxed dinner conversation like you're on the dance floor at a nightclub is not going to work.
2) Make direct eye contact.
Few things communicate your confidence better than making direct eye contact. Always look her in the eyes, and hold eye contact slightly longer than what is normally considered comfortable in ordinary situations.
A steady gaze is commonly very seductive, and helps create a strong connection between the two of you.
3) Use her name in your conversation.
When you repeat a woman's name while talking to her does several things:
First, it shows the woman that you're actually making an effort to use her name and remember it for the future.
And in a subtle way, it helps create familiarity and comfort when you mention someone's name while talking with them. If you do this, girls will feel familiar and comfortable with you instantly!
4) Ask questions about her, but do it right.
Women enjoy talking about themselves, and it's really good to show some interest in who she is. However, don't overdo it because it's easy to come across as putting too much importance on her. So don't make that mistake.
Be interested in who she is, and gather some details to identify common interests between you two. Common ground that you can make use of to create further connection.
For example, if she mentions having been to Hong Kong and you've been there too, you can connect to that and start talking about your own experiences there. This will help build a strong emotional connection.
5) Talk about your own life experiences.
Just like with the Hong Kong example, sharing stories you've experienced and adventures you've had helps shape her opinion of you and grabs her imagination. By sharing certain stories, you can guide her opinion of you and have her think what you want her to think about you.
6) Utilize flattery.
There's an old saying, "Flattery will get you everywhere!" And without a doubt, women enjoy it when men say flattering things about them - as long as it's genuine and unique.
You don't want to sound insincere or find yourself caught in a lie, or go around compromising your integrity by giving compliments for things you don't truly find enticing. But even more important, you don't want to be giving the same compliments everyone else does - then you just look like everyone else!
In short, if you can tell she gets compliments on her smile all the time, find something a little more interesting to flatter. Like maybe how her smile makes her nose crinkle in a charming way.
The key to flattery is to set yourself apart from every monkey complimenting her on the same smile.
7) Every once in a while, whisper.
Do this in such a way that it fits the context, naturally, but there are few things more seductive and flirtatious than whispering. Leaning in towards someone and lowering your voice creates an aura of intimacy that can not be resisted. In fact, the closer you get to her when whispering, the greater the level of intimacy and the stronger the connection.
8) Fill your voice with confidence.
The worst thing while flirting is to come off as not sure, insecure, or afraid. Be secure in yourself and your knowledge.
If she says something you disagree with, don't be afraid to set the record straight or get into a light argument if you have to. Provided you don't go crazy, women respond well to confidence and male aggression.
9) Make up nicknames.
When you give a name to something, you are symbolically expressing ownership over it. So when you give a nickname to a woman, you are concurrently establishing your dominance of the interaction and building an image she has to live up to.
For example, if she is cute and shy, you can start calling her hello kitty. Tease her and make some jokes on it. Soon, she'll come to associate hello kitty with you and strive to live up to the cute image solely for you.
10) Always leave her wanting more.
You don't want to exhaust everything in your flirting toolbox immediately, so shift between not-flirting and flirting. Flirting continually comes off as too strong, and it could be tough for you to keep putting that much energy into your interaction. Switching keeps you from tiring out even as it keeps the interaction going.
Also, it allows you to extend the interaction so when it's time to part ways, she'll still be interested in hearing more from you. A lot of men will start the flirting on a high note and let the energy drop so by the end, the woman has gotten her fill of you.
So always end your flirting session on a high note that leaves her wanting more!